Roquefort
"According to cheese.com - this is the king of cheeses. Ask K Bronson, and he'll describe it as f**king gorgeous. Either way, it sounds good."

St. Agur
"Gorgonzola for wimps! Oh baby, it's still damn fine though."

Camembert
"Smells like cauliflower, but it's good in the oven. Dip in a bit of bread and you're well away."

Brie
"Soft, French and said to be the queen of cheeses. Maybe Roquefort and Brie could get it on sometime? Now that we'd like to see. What a show that'd be!"

Cheddar
"We all know this biyatch. So dependable you can set your watch to it. If you've had a hard day, good 'ol cheddar will be there to sort it all out."

Jarlsberg
"A hole lot of fun. The only cheese that goes with anything and everything!"

Stilton
"Britains favourite bad boy blue. Not the most attractive of cheeses admittedly, but it's not all about looks you know. A bit of this, a glass of port and you've got the perfect recipe for gout!"

Edam
"Tastes delicious with a glass of Pinot Noir... so we've heard. Famous for being rubbery. Does it get any more commercial than Edam?!"

Laughing Cow
"Is this even a cheese?! Hmmm... that's a good question. Liquid cheese, mmmmmm. Tastes great when spread on skin."

Coq d'Fromage
"A fragrant little number that grows on you. Yummy!"